When I Fell In Love with You

Last night (time 01.30 AM) i was sitting in my room and i was listening a song of an old Hindi movie and the song lines were “Pal - Pal Dil Ke pas Tum Rahti ho”... as i usually do this when i am working and a cigarette between my fingers.

Meanwhile i was drafting an email regarding my next meeting with our client, in Park plaza Gurgaon, i was about to finishing the mail and clicked on send, then i thought sign out and sleep, at that time suddenly an unknown email dropped in my Gmail inbox. i clicked on that mail, that email opened and displayed on my laptop screen, it was reflecting the name of a girl A Mail from MEGHA, Subject line was “When I Fell In Love With You”

After that i clicked on that email, please wait...after few seconds’ mail displayed in front of me, and what she wrote in that email, now let me tell you...!!

I don’t know, what happened to her, it could happen to anybody, it doesn’t Matter where she lives or what her family background.” These are the poignant, rueful words of Megha, a 24-year-old girl who got drawn into a friend group and is currently being counselled by the charity based NGO in Delhi that helps girls recover from sexual exploitation in gangs.

There are several things that are surprising about Megha. She is academically smart and university educated. She comes from a loving, middle class family with a well-to-do father working in the financial sector. And she grew up in a detached three-bedroom house in a normal neighbourhood on the outskirts of Delhi lifestyle.
Megha was 24 and preparing for her IAS when she first met Ramik, 25, at a nightclub.He was good-looking and I was flattered that an older boy fancied me, she said. He was my first love and he knew how to chirps [sweet talk] me, but he was unpredictable. He would ring at 2am and ask, ‘are you asleep?’ and I would be like, no, because I didn’t want to be un-cool, and he would pressure me to go out. At first I resisted. Later I would sneak out the house.

Going out with Ramik meant hanging out with his three friends and smoking weed. They would rob off-licenses, deal in counterfeit money, sell class a [drugs] and plan violence. At raves, he made me carry his drugs in my bra. I didn’t even protest because that’s what other girlfriends did.





But the worst was yet to come. “We had sex after five months and at first it was good, but there was no such thing as ‘no means no’ to him. I had to do it whenever he wanted it.” Was she raped? “I suppose it was like rape. I had to sleep with him at his command. I was under such fear and intimidation. I was coerced. So yes, I was raped.”

Megha would comfort herself that she had girlfriend status. But girlfriends are just as disposable as links. I was never passed around but I would be told I was just a fuck. In friends, girls are bottom of the hierarchy.

By 18, I was working in a call centre and saving to travel in my gap year and one day I missed work and got an innocent text from a boy on the sales team saying ‘we missed you today, x’. That night Ramik went through my texts — constant surveillance and policing of girl’s phones is totally standard behaviour in boys — and he went mental when he saw the text and punched me in the face. Megha decided the relationship was over. But her close friend, Sarah, wore her down and convinced her to take Ramik back. Your friends say it’s okay and you start to think it is. Sarah had experienced much worse abuse. The violence becomes normalised, you lose sense of what is right.

After that Ramik would slap her around whenever he got in a rage. Once he smashed my head against the dashboard of his car because I talked to his friend. Things like that would set him off, and he would switch from violence to telling me how much he loved me. I blamed myself. My self-esteem was so low, I hated myself. I had become skinny anorexic, addicted to weed, and didn’t think I deserved better.

Somehow Megha got herself into university and away from India and after five years left Ramik, but she has been badly scarred. She believes that education in schools is the key, echoing a recommendation expected in tomorrow’s report from the deputy children’s commissioner. I had no education about healthy relationships or sexual exploitation or gangs in school, so I was totally unprepared,” she said.

Nikhil Singh 25, a famous content writer, said Megha’s experience is all too common. Often girls in gangs are given drugs and alcohol and the next day they wake up unable even to remember what happened but with pictures of themselves having had sex with more than one person. These images are texted or used through social media to bully or blackmail the girl into being raped again.

Indeed the Standard has been shown a shocking photograph — which we have decided not to publish — that epitomizes the depraved face of gang exploitation of girls in Delhi today. It shows six young gang members whooping and leering as an unclothed girl has sexual relations with two clothed boys at the same time. One gang member is videoing the scene.

The vulnerability and trauma of the young woman is not only in the moment, but is captured in sickening perpetuity for others to see.

Who are these gang rapists? In reality this could be any one from the criminal street gangs in Delhi.
For Megha, the battle to recover from years of abuse is still being fought. “I haven’t had a proper relationship since Ramik,” she said, her voice wavering between anger and despair. I am in therapy, but right now, I just can’t stand men.
Megha has been too afraid to go to the police because of what the gang might do to her family. To this day, my parents don’t know the horrific abuse I suffered, she said. It would break their hearts.
Instead of taking a hard action against this type of crime, A politician from our government said -'Boys make mistakes, why hang them?'

Then i thought that is she for on having sex, or is she for raped in a gang, i can't commit that what kind of people are living in our human society.
She is God gifted to our human society, respect her, worship her, "Na jaane kyo kuch log betio ko bojh samjte h, ek ladki jo humare samaj ki janani ha, ghinna aati h ye sunkar ki aise log bhi humare samaj ka hissa hai "